You DO Contribute

I frequent quite a few stay at home mom blogs and youtube channels when time permits, and I am struck by the constant comments from stay at home moms feeling guilty that they don't contribute financially to their homes.  They feel like they have to make up for this monetary loss with couponing, some type of at home work like watching children or an etsy shop, and depriving themselves.  Now I am not at all against couponing or earning extra money (as long as it doesn't interfere with your household duties or stress you out too much), and I certainly advise living within your means.  But the attitude that stay at home moms don't "contribute" to the family is ludicrous. 

You DO contribute.  If you never clip one coupon in your life, if sometimes you slip up and overspend, if you know that etsy shop is too much for you to handle, you still contribute!  Raising your children, taking care of your husband, keeping your home...these are all so valuable to your family.  A lot of our society doesn't value them today, but they are so very important. 

When women started entering the workforce in droves in the 70s, this country started changing their mindset on a woman's role in the family.  Remember, the Bible gave Adam the job of working the ground not Eve.  Titus 2:3-5 states that "The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed."  The key here is that the AGED women taught the young women.  Most of our mothers and even grandmothers worked a job.  The last generation did not for the most part teach this generation to be keepers of their homes.  They didn't teach their daughters homekeeping skills, they sent them to college so they could have a career (I am not against college at all, I just feel like young women should know that having a career is not always the path God wants them on, and they should consider their futures from multiple perspectives).  Do you think a typical 50s housewife felt guilty for not bringing cold, hard cash into the family?  No she did not.  She knew what she did was just as important as the financial support her husband provided.

I do understand that some women really do have to work, but I also know that the need to work was often created because they were not taught to look into the future and got themselves in a bit of a financial pinch (a house too big for one income, school loans, car payments, bad spending habits).  In the old days, it was assumed most women would stay home, so the future was planned out accordingly.  Unfortunately now, most women don't realize they want to stay home until they are ready for children, and by then the damage is already done.  But don't give up hope!  If you are called to stay at home, I really believe God will make a way for you if you do the work (see my you can be a stay at home mom series:  post 1, post 2, post 3, post 4) He is asking you to do.